2022

It’s been a hot minute since my last post, nearly three months in fact. So much has happened, yet so much has stayed the same. It’s an almost stagnant existence living in lockdown, yet here we are, a year down the line, a year since my first lockdown post: Working from home

So what have I been up to, you ask? Well…. I got my first jab! We bought a van! We explored the county!

You got your jab? Why yes, yes I did. I’m a key worker, so have been lucky enough to receive my vaccine earlier than so many others. It doesn’t mean that I can flout the rules, but it does mean that I can get back into school’s, I can get back to trying to do my job, and I can start thinking about getting out of the UK at long last. A trip home won’t be on the cards until next year though, as a stay in managed isolation is not a cost (of time or money) that I can afford right now.

You bought a van? Why yes, yes we did. It’s a big white one. Tall enough to stand up in. Long enough to hold a bed and a kitchen. So what are we doing with it? Well….. building a bed and a kitchen of course! With Covid restrictions set to stay in place around the world for a while longer, what better way to spend the upcoming summer than to drive around the UK and see the sights from the comfort of our own home on wheels. It needs work – we’ve already stripped it, rust proofed, re-floored, half insulated, and built a bed frame. Next we need to put in a window (which means cutting a great big hole in the wall!), finish insulating, clad the inside walls, and move onto building a kitchen, complete with sink and gas hob.

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It turns out that you can learn anything you want from the internet – thanks YouTube! Watching Van Build videos has become my new obsession, and I’m constantly learning new tricks and worrying about new problems. B&Q (UK’s answer to Mitre10) has become my favourite shop, and the weekend isn’t complete without a trip down the timber aisle to re-evaluate the width and weight of the chosen cladding. It turns out I’m quite the control freak when it comes to these types of things! Apologies to anyone who has ever tried to tell me this in the past, I believe you now!

So when we aren’t building a van, we’re exploring. Although we haven’t done as much since getting the van, its been wonderful to learn about the area a bit more and take beautiful drives to new places. Obviously lockdown rules say “Stay close to home”, so we have stuck as close as possible while still getting out of town. Turns out there is a whole lot to see in the surrounding few miles of Dorset! Forests, cliffs, hills, old army bunkers, you name it!

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The newest plan, with the weather slowly warming up, was to spend time cycling around the New Forest, however this was not to be! A visit to my backyard yealded no bike! Apparently a housemate had left the garden gate open, and an opportunistic somebody managed to make off with my bike (leaving the others of course). So I’ve been scouring Facebook and Ebay hoping to locate it, but so far, no luck. Perhaps it’s time for a new one? One that can fit in the van and come on trips with us?

Well anyway…. like I said, not much changes. I still spend my working day at home with the occasional visit to a school, I have a Covid test every Monday morning, and I haven’t hugged my friends in 12 months. I’m tired. The exhaustion of always being careful and worrying about the people around me has worn me down and I need a break. I wake every morning thinking “How much longer can I go on”, but then I get up, turn on my laptop, and get right back into the daily grind.

My thoughts are with everyone out there who is feeling the same, who is feeling ground down and emotional. We can only be there for each other and look after our neighbours.

It’s was the best of times; it was the worst of times.

Today is not what I imagined a year ago, but in some ways this year has been even better than I could have conceived.

With the rules around the UK changing regularly, my planned trip to Scotland with fellow Kiwis (postponed from Easter) was cancelled, and the outlook was grim. A Tier 2 Christmas without friends or family around to give me a reason to get out of bed. However Boris saw to it that this wasn’t the case, with London going into full Tier 4 lockdown, ensuring that my flatmate was around to keep me company. A loss for her, a win for me. What followed was a series of movies, video games, and snack filled days to warm the heart.

Christmas Day dawned cold and sunny, with a beautiful warm (for December) visit to a friends beach hut for coffee and cake, before heading home to prep and cook dinner, resulting in only two burns! Look mum, I learned to cook!

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As we reach the end of 2020, we head into Tier 4 lockdown, meaning no gatherings on the street to celebrate the end of this strange year. Instead we will step onto the street to yell at our neighbours briefly before retiring back to the warmth of our central heated homes, with hot chocolate and cream liquors.

To sum up this year, it has been amazing. I have been forced to be at home, with myself, something that I have never really done before. I have reflected on what I want in life, what I enjoy, and the impact I want to leave behind. I have made friends, incredible people who make me smile, and give me the strength to love myself.

I have spent many hours exploring the outskirts of the county, joining regular Sunday runs and walks with new friends with the Hash Harriers, early morning bootcamps in the rain, shine, and ice, a full summer of swims and beach hut coffee’s with the best friend a girl could ask for, and many incredible memories (online and in person) with my Brownies and my Red Cross team.

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Not travelling means I have had to face my fear of commitment, of getting attached to people and places, not being able to run away each weekend to a new place. What an eye opening experience! And I am leaving this year with fantastic friends and flatmates! I am so incredibly excited for what the year ahead holds!

Watch this space! Happy New Year to friends and family near and far! xxx

The last few months have been a blur, with a weekend away, a bought of covid, and a second lockdown, all vying for attention in amongst the grayness of autumn.

Starting in early October, a friend and I decided that a weekend away was needed to soothe our souls, and a trip to Kent was booked. It was a wonderful, grey, wet weekend, exploring the shops in Whitstable, Margate, and Canterbury, buying far too many book, and eating amazing food. We topped it off with a walk along the cliffs of Dover, admiring the ships, the people, and the wild landscape. It was pure bliss, and exactly what was needed as the summer retreated and another lockdown loomed over the UK.

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Exploring the seaside towns of Whitstable and Margate, it was easy to too how these places could become tourist havens in the hot summer months, with artistic and eclectic stores, lovely pebble beaches, and coffee shops every few yards. But this was October. Storm Alex was hitting, and Saturday was to rate as the wettest day in the UK since records began in 1891. Somehow we missed the worst of it, and spent much of the day buying books and exploring the Shell Grotto in Margate, a subterranean passageway covered in 4.6 million shells, completely covering the walls in beautiful and intricate mosaic’s. Originally discovered in 1835, it has had its share of wear and tear, most notably a wall missing due to a war-time bombing (in which war, I forget I’m afraid), and is currently preserved as a historical monument.

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We finished off a full day of exploring with an hour or so walk along the cliffs of Dover, a clear view of France in the distance, before stopping for a well earned hot chocolate at South Foreland Lighthouse and walking back in the icy wind to the warmth of the car, and the promise of fish and chips at the airbnb.

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Beach huts – they go for hundreds of thousands of pounds. Or you can sit on the council waiting list for 20 years to lease one long term. I simply hired one for a month. It was bliss!

Coming out of the first lockdown, I signed up to an early morning bootcamp, looking to get out the house and meet people. Making the most of the long summer, we attempted to spend as much time as possible down at the beach, drinking tea, and enjoying the views. Early morning bootcamps came with early morning swims, and curling up with a hot coffee and porridge, watching the world come alive.

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It was the perfect summer stay-cation with the best people, and significantly made up for the lack of travel and adventure. Furnished only with a gas bottle and a double cooker, the hut provided a space to relax out the wind, prepare for the day, or read books without being walked over by the other beach goers.

The weather has now turned, and the wind is icy. I miss the hut with its warmth and views, but next time I venture down to the beach it will be with a wetsuit and a flask of something hot.

With a”heatwave” hitting the UK last weekend, and Bournemouth being the beach destination of choice for many around the country, I was given the amazing opportunity to travel west and head to North Devon for some much needed rest and recuperation away from the crowds.

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Although grey and overcast for much of the weekend, it was hot and muggy, and regular swims were absolutely necessary. We began the weekend with an early morning swim in the choppy ocean, followed by a lovely warm day in the little village of Appledore, drinking coffee, eating ice cream, and exploring the little shops on the side streets. The majority of people were wearing masks when indoors, however it was not consistent, and it was hard to know if either locals and tourists were taking the Covid situation seriously. I was pleasantly surprised by the lack of huge crowds, although the traffic on the motorways suggested that perhaps we were simply lucky in our location, and that the tourists were gathered elsewhere along the coast .

We were lucky enough to spend the following day in Clovelly, a quaint village build around a steep harbour, owned by one singular man, John Rous, whose family has had the village since 1738. While the history is fascinating, the harbour itself is beautiful and provided us with a calm yet cold swim, and delicious cheesy chips in the beating sun. Just what the doctor ordered.

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Back in Bournemouth, the temperatures are still in the high 20’s with a beating sun and hot clammy nights, meaning trips into the air conditioned office during the day, and saving exercise for after sunset. I’m holding out for the end of the summer holidays when children return to school and more people return to work. I need a break, and might finally allow myself some time off work when the beaches are less busy.

I sound like a stuck record, but I am tired of people’s recklessness in the eye of the storm. This week signaled the first Covid cases in New Zealand in over 100 days, and the country has returned to the early stage of lockdown, leaving me slightly less optimistic about any real change here in the UK. For now I’ll keep staying home when possible, wearing a mask, and sanitising my hands every ten minutes.

I read a blog this morning that spoke directly to what is currently worrying me – one company, two offices, two vastly different pandemic behaviours.

I live in the south of England. Read golden sand beaches and warm(ish) water. So when we encounter a “heat wave” by English standards, the beaches are crowded by large groups seeking to party, hang out with friends, and generally reek destruction. The council struggles with the amount of rubbish being scattered, the number of cars parked illegally, and the complete and utter lack of respect for anyone trying to follow the social distancing rules.

The papers report that the majority of beach goers are from London or Birmingham, a 6-hour round trip from here. The Emergency Department is full of sunburnt idiots after beach scuffles. What does this mean? All of them have to be treated as COVID cases due to raised temperatures, most likely due to dehydration and sunstroke.

Most of my colleagues and fellow volunteers are staying home, ignoring the loosening of lockdown rules, and continuing to behave as if they could get the virus at any time. The locals are avoiding the beaches that their tax pounds are paying to have cleaned every morning before the hordes descend. Each time I have I have been to the beach to swim, I have chosen to go after dinner, as the sun is setting, and even then it is full of partiers and drunken hubbub, sunburnt bodies gleaning in the setting sun.

I struggle to comprehend that so many people think so little of the people around them, think so much of themselves, that they do not see the problems that they are causing. A £35 parking ticket is worth it for a day on the beach with 50 of their closest friends.

Teachers are scared, they have to go back into schools with their bubbles, and I follow every rule that the school puts in place – no touching of any item, only observing children outside during playtimes, face masks, hand sanitiser, no entering into any other class bubble. I am just as anxious as the schools, but I know that they need answers and help with their children, so I will break out of my own safe bubble and enter into theirs for a couple hours a week. All while there are people out there who are happily risking the lives of everybody around them by simply not staying away from each other and choosing parties over safety.

Bars open this weekend. I am expecting carnage. Already a city has been put back into full lockdown. We are a ticking time bomb, just in time for the summer holidays that will bring more crowds and more hysteria.

Firstly, I want to acknowledge the current struggles that are occurring in America and around the world. My heart aches and I feel guilty that my current troubles are minuscule in comparison. I am trying to educate myself, and keep the conversation going. There are so many resources out there you can use to educate yourself, so please take the time.

This site has a lot of links, where you can sign petitions and donate to the official George Floyd Memorial Fund. https://blacklivesmatters.carrd.co/#

Some books that have been recommended:

• Why I’m no Longer Talking to White People about Race
• White Fragility
• Me and White Supremacy

#blacklivesmatter

So nearly 3 months into UK’s supposed lockdown, I broke. Physically, mentally, emotionally. No, not quite, but I certainly have had a weekend of disasters, for all intents and purposes, due to lockdown and the strange rules surrounding it here in England. Up until this point I had managed to keep working, enjoy the impending summer with daily exercise, and keep a self-care routine that matches almost all the mental health guidelines at this time.

Then disaster struck. It began with a twinge in my foot at the beginning of a 90 Mile (145km) virtual challenge and developed into full blown agony and the inability to weight bear for 24 hours. With rest, ice, and some stretches, the stress injury will hopefully heal, but not in time to finish the challenge I am afraid. I am certain that my shoes are to blame as I am beginning to see the meshing of the sole due to my extensive lockdown exercise regime. Shoes shops are not open yet, and online orders an almost impossible when my support needs appear to change every time I buy new running shoes. I’m holding on for a June 15 opening date at my local running shop.

This same day also heralded a new and unusual tooth sensitivity that I am contributing to a mixture of stress and possible need for a filling. Again, dentists are not yet open, despite national guidance that they would be open on June 1st. They do not have the PPE required and are choosing to stay closed – a choice I support as long as I don’t require any emergency tooth extractions. I am not one for tooth pain, so this is a new and slightly nerve racking experience that I have managed to avoid for much of my life due to excellent early dentistry in childhood.

And finally, in a cruel twist of fate, now that schools are open and I need to drive to see clients, my NZ drivers license has reached its 12 month allowance in the UK. This means that my car insurance has been cancelled, my car is not allowed on the road, and I am not allowed to drive. All while the DVLA has put a halt on applications for international license exchanges due to COVID. If I had planned ahead and applied back in February then yes, this wouldn’t have happened. However I didn’t, and now I am transport-less, despite being an “essential worker” for whom rules appear to be a bit more blurry. Along with my inability to walk much, I am now unable to venture very far, let alone enjoy the easing of lockdown.

So do bad things come in 3’s? Apparently so. But I still have my job, (most of) my health, and a bicycle that could, at a push, get me to and from schools and home visits, although perhaps not with the myriad of resources I need to actually assess my clients. In the meantime, I will lie in bed with my foot elevated, order pizza delivery to comfort my soul (and make up for my lack of exercise), and watch jealously as NZ returns to a sense of normalcy. At least I know that my family and friends are safe and in good political hands. Thanks Aunty Jacinda. xx

As I reach Day 10 of my 14 day quarantine, it’s the little things that are bringing me daily excitement and delight, like walks in the sun, reading new books, and listening to the foxes in their pre-dawn explorations.

Two weeks ago, my flatmate, an essential worker, was informed that a colleague had been hospitalised. The same day she had done her weekly trip to care for her disabled sister, only to be greeted with a feverish mess, becoming ill herself a few short days later. So, into quarantine the rest of our house (mostly) went. It is debatable to what levels of stringent isolation we have each gone into, and I have continued on my daily walks around the area, often venturing into the middle of the road to avoid people and animals. Quarantine means no shopping, but exercise is still allowed, so I have made the most of that.

Due to varying levels within the house, and myself having spent more time with the ill flatmate, I decided to move my office from the dining room to my bedroom. Cue shoe boxes on drawers to form a makeshift standing desk, as I have nowhere to sit except my bed. 10 days in, and my bed has replaced my standing desk, unless on a video call where beds are deemed inappropriate.

We are now 5 weeks into lockdown, and I am so grateful that I am so introverted! I love my own space, and apart from missing my grocery shopping trips during this short quarantine period, don’t miss much else. I still have weekly Brownie meetings and get to see what my Brownies are up to on Whatsapp. I have weekly Red Cross meetings, and sign on to the Support Phone Line when possible. I message my friends regularly, and phone my parents every few days, so that hasn’t changed much.

What I do miss though, are my rare excursions over the road to my friends house, to sit in the garden and chat about life, faith, and everything else. When this is all over, we will picnic. We will chat. We will spend time together. I am looking forward to that.

It will be some time before I venture overseas again, instead I am planning on going camping and enjoying the beauty that the UK has to offer. There is so much that I wanted to do, and only realised once I was unable to. So I will start making a list of places on this island that I will visit and explore, instead of places in Europe. Or as well as, because I can’t lie, I still want to explore more there too. In the meantime, I will continue on my daily walks, and start making a shopping list for this weekend when I will finally be able to stock up again.

Being in lockdown with children is hard, or so my friends and colleagues tell me. There is pressure to educate, to feed healthy meals, and to keep them active, all while continuing to work from home and look after your own wellbeing.

Many people around the world are developing resources for children to keep them happy, healthy, and busy, while also trying to support the parents and adults around them, so I thought I’d put together some of my favourite activities.

ELSA Support 14 days of activities: https://www.elsa-support.co.uk/coronavirus-14-day-self-isolation-activities/

Sparklers at Home: https://sparklers.org.nz/parenting/

PE with Joe: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HCtg5QDD_r0

Save the Children: https://www.savethechildren.org.uk/what-we-do/coronavirus-information-advice

While many of these resources are for learning and keeping busy, it is also important to families to look at dealing with trauma, anxiety, and possible bereavement. As part of my job, I am currently dealing with supporting schools and families, and signposting useful resources for dealing with the fallout of this lie changing pandemic.

Winston’s Wish: https://www.winstonswish.org/

Family Information Directory: https://www.fid.bcpcouncil.gov.uk/kb5/poole/fis/site.page?id=E-GOWcpQTdA

Child Mind Institute: https://childmind.org/guide/helping-children-cope-traumatic-event/

Finally, if all else fails, Netflix has plenty of children’s movies to keep them occupied. Disney movies are always a winner, as are anything with singing (cue Frozen, The Lego Movie, Moana, and Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory). Add in Horrible Histories, and they’re learning too!

Don’t set yourself high expectations! As long as children are having a bath once every few days, and aren’t going hungry, then they’re thriving in lockdown. Good job!

Lockdown is not a state of being that many people are accustomed to. It is lonely, it is uncomfortable, and it is static. Days flow into each other, with not much separating weekdays from weekends, and boredom sets in despite the tasks that you set yourself.

I’ve been lucky, I can work from home. Schools closed on the 20th of March. I started isolating two days beforehand. I’ve been in isolation from more than 20 days. I still go out though. I deliver essential items to the elderly and vulnerable with the British Red Cross. I respond to emergencies that others cannot respond to. I am lucky to have no underlying conditions.

The biggest question at the moment however, is how do I support my schools? How do I support my vulnerable students? It’s a topic that I spend time thrashing out everyday, sometimes alone, sometimes with colleagues. There are so many resources out there, but sometimes there are too many. It’s too hard for parents to sift through the thousands of web pages and videos, all while learning how to homeschool children through this traumatic time.

So I got creative. Or tried to at least. I think making resources would be much easier with a child to experiment upon, so instead I’m winging it an hoping that someone somewhere will like what I’ve made. If not…. at least I still have a day job.

What else does one do while stuck at home for weeks on end? Walk around the block numerous times a day (breaking the one daily exercise block rule)? Bake cookies? Chat to the friend over the road from 2 metres away (or yell down the driveway)? Bake cookies? Go for a bike ride (again breaking the one exercising block a day rule)? Bake cookies? Do body weight exercises in the back garden? Eat cookies?

There are so many options!

As long as I shower and brush my teeth, then I know that I have had a good day in lockdown. If I venture outside, then I know it has been even better. And if I eat some vegetables, then it has been amazing. That is all that matters at this time.